BBC2 - 11.00am - Asterix Versus Caesar
Watch those plucky little Gauls stick it to the mighty Romans! Yay!
CH4 - 1.00pm - Warlords of Atlantis
Starring Doug McClure. You may know him from such films as...this one.
BBC1 - 2.35pm - Diagnosis Murder
In today's episode, a devious daughter's deadly scheme (loving the alliteration there) is uncovered by Mark Sloan, but believes he can be outwitted, the foolish woman. Doesn't she know he can uncover her fiendish plot with a natty dance routine and a highly authentic "cockernee" accent?
ITV1 - 3.00pm - Have I Been Here Before?
Celebrities being regressed to discover their past lives, what more could you want from daytime telly?
CH4 - 5.25pm - Big Brother's Little Brother
Presented by everyone's favourite fake Irishman, Dermot O'Leary
CH4 - 9.00pm - Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares
In which the top chef teaches more hapless fools that the best way to run a successful restaurant is to shout at your staff and swear a lot
CH4 - 10.55pm - Hollyoaks
Another late night "special" for the Chester-based teatime teen soap. Judging from the previous efforts, this will involve an increased level of innuendo, and one or more of the identikit blonde girls wandering around in her knickers
CH5 - 11.25pm - 101 Best Kept Hollywood Secrets
I'm guessing if they were that well kept, Channel 5 wouldn't know them
And I don't have any of that fancy telly, so I'm not telling you what's on the other channels...
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