1. Placing a chip shop within sniffing distance of a bus stop is sheer cruelty: emerging to the delicious aroma of potatoes immersed in fat, sprinkled with salt, and soaked in vinegar presents far too much of a temptation for a hungry soul such as me. On this occasion I resisted, but who could blame me for failing? No wonder we Scots are the heart attack champions of Europe, it clogs your arteries just thinking of it....
2. There is a time and a place for dawdling, but in the high street in front of me is not it. Only stop dead in front of me if you feel strong enough to withstand the curse of the evil eye; block up a pavement if you enjoy the sensation of an elbow in your ribs. Ancient old biddies I can just about forgive - at least they have the excuse of infirmity - but in the relatively young there is no excuse for such behaviour. Do people really have nothing better to do with their days? Is the concept of a bog-standard collection of retailers so overwhelming that they have to traverse as slowly as possible to savour every second of the experience? Or is it just a conspiracy to drive the normally-paced amongst us to the edge, creating an army of outraged and irritated citizens willing to overthrow society for the chance of unrestricted passage? Who can tell...
An unrelated matter - do I really want to chat to someone who lists amongst their Yahoo interests masturbation, voyeurism, and cumshots? I suspect not...
No comments:
Post a Comment